One of the realities of COVID 19 is the fact that a lot of couples no longer have a place to run to avoid the true state of their relationship with their spouse. To say the truth, the pandemic acts like an amplifying lens. Pre-COVID-19 it was easy to wake up, jump into the shower and out of the door you go till evening. You get back and sing the ‘I am tired’ song or ‘It’s been a long busy day’.
We all have our areas of vulnerability; it is our we approach and deal with it that matters. Masking and hiding them can only make matters worse in the future. Understanding the reasons why you feel the way you do can help you manage your emotions better.
One of the major causes of low self-esteem and confidence is a difficult childhood, it may affect the way you perceive yourself. If you don’t feel attractive and confident you may question your spouse’s commitment to you. If you feel jealous in your relationship it may be due to your own vulnerability rather than what your spouse has done or is doing. Bringing baggage’s from past experience into your home can also cause jealousy.
Feeling jealous becomes an issue when you begin to react negatively towards your partner.
Some tell-tales behaviours of a jealous partner
👉Constant checking of partner’s phone
👉Responding negatively and rudely
👉Accusing your partner without evidence
👉Monitoring partner’s movements online and whereabouts during the day.
👉Assuming you are not good enough for your partner
How to deal with jealousy
Of a truth you may have genuine reasons to feel jealous but rather than attacking your partner you can first talk about how you feel – focusing on your feelings rather than blaming. Talking can help prevent your feelings from turning into resentment.
If you both value your relationship then you will learn to put your relationship first before any other albeit your work, children associates or friends.
Transparency is the key word, be open about past relationships and present challenges. Being vulnerable with each other will foster love unity and a deeper level of understanding.